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The last payphone in the USA. Probably.

Valley Springs, California

Kirkwood to Leo Carrillo via Carrizo Plain

Kirkwood to Leo Carrillo via Carrizo Plain

Marcus Ulrich avatarMarcus Ulrich

After spending a week skiing and generally hanging out in cold places, it was time to head south to visit family ... and the beach. The good part about not being able to go over 60 mph on the freeway is it doesn't make much difference if you take the slower highways, so I decided to get off the straight and boring Interstate 5 around Avenal and make my way through Carrizo Plain National Monument and then the Los Padres National Forest via Highway 33 to Ojai and eventually Ventura.

I initially got off I5 near Avenal because it seemed like it might have a quiet spot to post up for the night with decent cell reception so I could get lots of work done. I didn't see anything I liked and moments after I started on the 2-lane highway towards Avenal I was enveloped in fog so thick I could barely see the road. Not the sort of place to turn around while pulling a trailer.

Eventually, I found a quiet spot at the turnoff for Bitterwater Valley Road near Blackwells Corner. A nearby sign for the 'California Resources Company' gave me pause. It's always hard to tell how busy a place might be come morning. Sure enough, at about 7 am, the sound of trucks smashing the metal bars of the nearby cattle guard together made for jarring but effective alarm clock.

I had no real goal except to get to Ventura and eventually Leo Carrillo. Looking at the map, I saw the Carrizo Plain National Monument with a few interesting spots like Soda Lake and Trevor Ranch and a couple campgrounds. I'd never heard of the Carrizo Plain and I think it's more popular as a springtime superbloom destination, but I'm partial to visiting places in their off-season.

Carrizo Plain didn't disappoint, which was probably because I had no expectations. It was dry, empty and vast with a couple birds circling above the only sign of life. There's a couple abandoned ranches in the park, but they're not particularly old and don't look too different from houses just outside the park, except the ones outside the park have hand-scrawled no-trespassing signs and the kind of black plastic tarps that usually surrounds weed farms. And lots of Trump flags.

Most of the park doesn't have cell reception, but I got signal again near Trevor Ranch so I stayed there for the night. I would have explored a little more, but I was running low on gas so I didn't want to go too much out of my way. The roads were unpaved in for a few miles, but in good condition at the time. The next day, I continued on to Leo Carrillo, stopping for coffee in Ventura.

Carrizo Plain is a fascinating place, but it probably wouldn't appeal to most people unless there's a superbloom. It's a fun place to explore if you're not in a hurry and you're towing your house around though.

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Acorn Campground next to New Hogan Lake. 

Valley Springs, California
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Water level looking pretty low.

Valley Springs, California
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What's that fuzz all over the ground?

Valley Springs, California
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Oh. Oh no.

Valley Springs, California
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On my way south, I pulled off the road here for the night since it was close enough to the main highway to have good cell reception but far enough to not be loud. But what's this 'California Resources Company' I wondered. Some sort of oil company it seemed from the Internet. Probably fine to park here for a few hours? I thought.

Kern County, California
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At like 1 am I woke up to what sounded like a bunch of metal bars all being slammed together. I had no idea what it was but decided to just go back to sleep. Fortunately it only happened the one time in the middle of the night, but around 7 am it started happening about every 10 minutes. When I finally got up to investigate I saw it was tanker trucks that had dislodged all the metal tubes that made up a cattle guard, so every time they drove over it they all crashed together. They would then pause for like 5 minutes in front of my car before getting on the highway. Probably wondering what jackass thought it was a good idea to camp there ... or maybe disengaging 4-wheel drive mode or something? Who knows.

Kern County, California
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Despite the noise, I'm glad I stopped where I did. I lost cell coverage pretty quickly once I started down the road and there wasn't anywhere else I could pull far enough off the road to be safe.  The night before the fog had been so thick I could hardly see the road.

Kern County, California
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This would be a fun road to bikepack. Hardly any traffic.

San Luis Obispo County, California
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Can you see the "Let's Go Brandon" sign?

San Luis Obispo County, California
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Don't worry. Brandon will make it rain.

San Luis Obispo County, California
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My goal for the day was to see the Carrizo Plain because wtf is the Carrizo Plain anyway. Turns out it's pretty cool, but also pretty dead in the middle of winter.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Beautiful Soda Lake. "Let's mine that thing!" someone in the late 1800's.

Santa Barbara County, California
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They do a good job of mowing the grass.

Santa Barbara County, California
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A cool little hill next to Soda Lake.

Santa Barbara County, California
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I feel like the blunt-nosed leopard lizard and San Joaquin antelope squirrel also deserve their pictures on this.

Santa Barbara County, California
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TIL

Santa Barbara County, California
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I wonder if an antelope squirrel lives in that hole.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Oh look, I can see my house from here. Also some meth houses in the distance I was too scared to take pictures of. 

Santa Barbara County, California
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It looks beautiful, but this is my nightmare: shady solar panels and no cell coverage. Onward!

Santa Barbara County, California
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Solved the shade, but still no cell coverage.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Well, I guess I can make a cup of coffee and stare at the cool view.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Staring at the view got boring pretty quick, so I went for a hike and took more pictures of my car looking rugged.

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Come on Toyota, you should put this in an advertisement. So you can sell more cars from 2008.

Santa Barbara County, California
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A charming house to camp in front of. Almost certainly not haunted.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Abandoned houses are great for wildlife. Let's build more of them.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Sooo ... how did those giant pillars snap? Wind I guess?

Santa Barbara County, California
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A tractor!

Santa Barbara County, California
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A lonely tractor

Santa Barbara County, California
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What else was I gonna do but run around and take pictures of tractors.

Santa Barbara County, California
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neat

Santa Barbara County, California
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Honk, honk! Wait, do tractors even have horns?

Santa Barbara County, California
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Kneel before me, puny human

Santa Barbara County, California
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Not a single car went by until the next morning.

Santa Barbara County, California
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Good night tractors. Time to go watch Youtu ... I mean work on my coding. Yes, there was cell reception here. Yay!

Santa Barbara County, California
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50 shades of grey

Kern County, California
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Future exhibit?

Kern County, California
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I stopped here to eat breakfast/lunch while going over the mountains of the Los Padres National Forest and heading towards Ojai.

Ventura County, California
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Twisty

Ventura County, California
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Just in time for sunset in front of Leo Carrillo beach

Ventura County, California
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Leo Carrillo Campground from above. Because of course I hiked up the hills next to it.

Los Angeles County, California
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Pretty clear skies and views of Point Dume and all the way to Palos Verdes and Catalina.

Los Angeles County, California
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